Shopping fun

Just as a preface... the picture to the left is a visual supplement for the residents of Southern Indiana/Northern Kentucky, better known as "Kentuckiana." Keep that in mind.


Yeahhhhhh. On my last day at home, I decided to go shopping with Jen. Not only because it'll be my last day with my family for a while, but I literally have no clothing. The extra 60 dollars I had was burning a hole in my pocket, so I just needed to spend it. We made our way to Taco Bell first. Man, I get the exact same thing every single time, which is bizarre. For some reason, I assume it's going to taste horrible sometime, but come on. How the fuck can you mess up a quesadilla?

After spending fifteen minutes in the bathroom praying to the porcelain God, we scampered over to Old Navy. Every time I come home and see the Kentuckiana regulars, I always feel better about myself. Don't get me wrong, I find myself to be a pretty good looking guy, but I still notice myself struggling with the occasional "self-conscious about my look" battle.

Well God damn, I sure feel a whole lot better. I simply can't quantify how many fat, overweight, inbred looking mother fuckers I saw while Jen and I were out. Crooked faces, droopy eyes, thirteen chins, revolting teeth that looked like some asshole kid ran through a graveyard and kicked over a series of tombstones. Plus, some of the most revolting haircuts known in existence: reverse mullets, long, flowing rat tails, butt cuts... I could go on for days. I'd pay thousands of dollars to see any of these people fornicate. There'd be enough friction and grease to power the main strip of Vegas for a week! Not to mention some pretty bad ass squishy noises.

Just like Campbell's, coming home is MMMMM, MMMMM Good.
...in the trousers.

Off topic, but another amazing quote from being home:

"OWW! Damn it, your sloth toenails just cut my foot!"
-Mom yelling at Dad's attempt to be romantic